Showing posts with label similes and metaphors. Show all posts
Showing posts with label similes and metaphors. Show all posts

Monday, May 20

We've all heard the advice "show, don't tell," but putting it into practice can be a challenge. Today I'd like to share one of my favorite techniques for showing how a character's mind has been shaped--associations.

Associations are “tip of the mind” thoughts that, like icebergs, show only a portion of the whole story. Most of the mass is hidden under the surface, whether it's a mass of history or emotion. Associations are a huge part of character voice because they tell a tremendous amount about a person in just a few words.

Think of the word-association games psychotherapists use. When your character hears the word “home,” does he think “fried chicken,” “fear,” or “fantasy”? Any one of these answers gives a window into an intriguing story.

Associations can be a shorthand way of showing what kind of past experiences the character has gone through, what he values, and what forms of culture shape him. Associations show up in the way characters describe things, and especially how they make comparisons, such as similes and metaphors.

Here are a few associations at work from my novel Never Gone:

Images burst in my mind like sudden sun through stained glass.

This person is someone who frequents:
a. sport arenas
b. churches
c. suburban malls


“Crikey,” Uncle says. “We’re in Dante’s eighth circle of hell.”

This person is...
a. a man of the soil who works with his hands
b. an Irish dancer who dreams of becoming the next Michael Flatley
c. an educated bloke who has studied Classical literature

Side note: Associations to other literature or film--allusions--can be used strategically to bring themes of the other work to bear on yours. Dante's eighth circle of hell is for "sowers of discord" (people who cause conflict and dissension between others) and their fate is to be cut to pieces. This is thematically important to the story, and the uncle's role especially. 

The simile and metaphor in each of these examples pours a great deal of back story into the characters without my having to tell you "Dani grew up attending church every Sunday without fail," or "Uncle Philip took a First in Classics before attending law school."  As a reader, I'm bored being told these rather dull facts. It's far more interesting to see how life experiences shape the characters' minds. Don't you agree?

Tips for developing associations 

1. Determine a few key environmental pieces for each character. Having more than one will make for an interesting, multi-layered personality, rather than a repetitive, one-note character.

They should be important for how the character interacts with others and moves the plot along. Be careful about this second bit--it's very easy for associations to become tangents that muddy the story rather than enhance it.

For example, my protagonist Danielle is a Christian artist who likes to read fantasy novels. Each of these pieces play into how she perceives the world. She's attuned to the spiritual aspects of life, she is visually driven and deeply imaginative. She tends to mentally rearrange what she sees so she can draw it the way she wants, which creates spiritual blindness in her. All three factors shape her motivations and the kinds of reactions she has to events.

2. Research the environmental factor and make a sheet of key terms, images, events, allusions, etc.

Some terms and images from Dani's character sheet:

steeples, stained glass, hymns, Psalms, kneeling, prayer, angels, demons, Jonah and the whale, the Good Shepherd, parable of the lost sheep

galleries, museums, Metropolitan, MoMA, Frick, sketch pad, charcoal, graphite, shade, stroke, cross-hatch, curve, line, plane, hue, perspective, vanishing point, orb, cone, cylinder, still life, landscape, portrait

castles, magic, Harry Potter, invisibility cloak, spells, Hogwarts, Hagrid, Lord of the Rings, Denethor and Faramir

3. Look for opportunities to layer associations into each character's thought life and dialogue. Associations most naturally occur when describing something or making comparisons.

How might using associations enhance your characterization? Which authors use this technique well?
Monday, May 20, 2013 Laurel Garver
We've all heard the advice "show, don't tell," but putting it into practice can be a challenge. Today I'd like to share one of my favorite techniques for showing how a character's mind has been shaped--associations.

Associations are “tip of the mind” thoughts that, like icebergs, show only a portion of the whole story. Most of the mass is hidden under the surface, whether it's a mass of history or emotion. Associations are a huge part of character voice because they tell a tremendous amount about a person in just a few words.

Think of the word-association games psychotherapists use. When your character hears the word “home,” does he think “fried chicken,” “fear,” or “fantasy”? Any one of these answers gives a window into an intriguing story.

Associations can be a shorthand way of showing what kind of past experiences the character has gone through, what he values, and what forms of culture shape him. Associations show up in the way characters describe things, and especially how they make comparisons, such as similes and metaphors.

Here are a few associations at work from my novel Never Gone:

Images burst in my mind like sudden sun through stained glass.

This person is someone who frequents:
a. sport arenas
b. churches
c. suburban malls


“Crikey,” Uncle says. “We’re in Dante’s eighth circle of hell.”

This person is...
a. a man of the soil who works with his hands
b. an Irish dancer who dreams of becoming the next Michael Flatley
c. an educated bloke who has studied Classical literature

Side note: Associations to other literature or film--allusions--can be used strategically to bring themes of the other work to bear on yours. Dante's eighth circle of hell is for "sowers of discord" (people who cause conflict and dissension between others) and their fate is to be cut to pieces. This is thematically important to the story, and the uncle's role especially. 

The simile and metaphor in each of these examples pours a great deal of back story into the characters without my having to tell you "Dani grew up attending church every Sunday without fail," or "Uncle Philip took a First in Classics before attending law school."  As a reader, I'm bored being told these rather dull facts. It's far more interesting to see how life experiences shape the characters' minds. Don't you agree?

Tips for developing associations 

1. Determine a few key environmental pieces for each character. Having more than one will make for an interesting, multi-layered personality, rather than a repetitive, one-note character.

They should be important for how the character interacts with others and moves the plot along. Be careful about this second bit--it's very easy for associations to become tangents that muddy the story rather than enhance it.

For example, my protagonist Danielle is a Christian artist who likes to read fantasy novels. Each of these pieces play into how she perceives the world. She's attuned to the spiritual aspects of life, she is visually driven and deeply imaginative. She tends to mentally rearrange what she sees so she can draw it the way she wants, which creates spiritual blindness in her. All three factors shape her motivations and the kinds of reactions she has to events.

2. Research the environmental factor and make a sheet of key terms, images, events, allusions, etc.

Some terms and images from Dani's character sheet:

steeples, stained glass, hymns, Psalms, kneeling, prayer, angels, demons, Jonah and the whale, the Good Shepherd, parable of the lost sheep

galleries, museums, Metropolitan, MoMA, Frick, sketch pad, charcoal, graphite, shade, stroke, cross-hatch, curve, line, plane, hue, perspective, vanishing point, orb, cone, cylinder, still life, landscape, portrait

castles, magic, Harry Potter, invisibility cloak, spells, Hogwarts, Hagrid, Lord of the Rings, Denethor and Faramir

3. Look for opportunities to layer associations into each character's thought life and dialogue. Associations most naturally occur when describing something or making comparisons.

How might using associations enhance your characterization? Which authors use this technique well?

Monday, January 21

Today is my final installment of my series on "Reducing Bloat / Revising Overwriting."

Overly elaborate diction is what most think of when they hear the term "overwriting." I'd argue it's just one facet of a tendency to go thick, lush and heavy-handed when drafting. The trick is to identify and correct it during revision.

Advanced vocabulary
Your characters' word choices show us who they are, so it's important to be accurate. Generally word choices should be consistent with a character's age, level of education and socio-economic status. Just as a fifth grader wouldn't discuss post-feminist hegemony, a college professor wouldn't call his enemy "stinkypants."

There are exceptions, however. You might sprinkle in words like "indubitably" and "elementary" to show that your fifth grader fancies himself an amateur sleuth like Sherlock Holmes. A social climber might adopt fancy lingo but misuse it. A grade-skipping child prodigy would wield her vocabulary like a weapon.

As you revise, be willing to question your word choices. Advanced vocabulary can communicate some things you don't intend. It gives the impression that you, the writer, are insecure or a bit out of touch. It can also taint your characters with a popular stereotype: the evil genius whose intelligence is paired with heartless ambition, or the socially awkward hopeless nerd whose head is stuffed with useless knowledge.

Literary devices
As I wrote in this post, sound devices can be an effective tool to make your work sing. But if you're too heavy-handed, it sounds silly or just plain annoying. Generally assonance (repeated internal vowel sounds) is less jarring than alliteration (repeated initial consonant sounds) or rhyming, so you can be a little freer with it.

How heavy is too heavy? I don't have a hard and fast rule. If sound is a big piece of your style, you'll have a hard time identifying overkill. Ask three or four trustworthy readers who get your intent to help you trim all but the best of your devices.

Metaphor and simile can quickly become overdone. Beware of the tendency to describe every detail through comparisons. Watch out especially for inept comparisons that don't fit the character or situation. Stephanie Thornton posted some hilarious examples of simile gone awry.

A whole-work "controlling metaphor" or motif is often fine, however. If done well, it can unify and strengthen your work. Sarah Dessen's Lock and Key, for example, uses the motif of doors, keys, fences, houses to examine what makes a place home, and people around us family.

Allusion can be an effective way to say a lot in a small space--your reader will pour in all the context without your needing to explain. But if the book, film, song or historical event you reference is too obscure, it hinders rather than helps your reader. A character whose thoughts are filled with allusions to pop culture will come across as shallow and lacking original ideas of his own.

Name dropping brands is another type of allusion that becomes irksome quickly. Call your fleece jacket a "North Face" once, then stick with generic terms like fleece or jacket in subsequent reference.

Dialect
Take extra care when presenting a character whose regional accent isn't mainstream. The best way to handle dialect is through word order, cadence, grammar, and word choice. But go lightly, especially with regionalisms like "youse guys" or "blimey" or "y'all." And as much as possible, stick to standard spellings. If you've done your research and can imitate the cadence and use the right lingo, your readers will "hear" the dialect without the tortured spellings.

Which of these diction areas trips you up? Any other helpful hints to add?
Monday, January 21, 2013 Laurel Garver
Today is my final installment of my series on "Reducing Bloat / Revising Overwriting."

Overly elaborate diction is what most think of when they hear the term "overwriting." I'd argue it's just one facet of a tendency to go thick, lush and heavy-handed when drafting. The trick is to identify and correct it during revision.

Advanced vocabulary
Your characters' word choices show us who they are, so it's important to be accurate. Generally word choices should be consistent with a character's age, level of education and socio-economic status. Just as a fifth grader wouldn't discuss post-feminist hegemony, a college professor wouldn't call his enemy "stinkypants."

There are exceptions, however. You might sprinkle in words like "indubitably" and "elementary" to show that your fifth grader fancies himself an amateur sleuth like Sherlock Holmes. A social climber might adopt fancy lingo but misuse it. A grade-skipping child prodigy would wield her vocabulary like a weapon.

As you revise, be willing to question your word choices. Advanced vocabulary can communicate some things you don't intend. It gives the impression that you, the writer, are insecure or a bit out of touch. It can also taint your characters with a popular stereotype: the evil genius whose intelligence is paired with heartless ambition, or the socially awkward hopeless nerd whose head is stuffed with useless knowledge.

Literary devices
As I wrote in this post, sound devices can be an effective tool to make your work sing. But if you're too heavy-handed, it sounds silly or just plain annoying. Generally assonance (repeated internal vowel sounds) is less jarring than alliteration (repeated initial consonant sounds) or rhyming, so you can be a little freer with it.

How heavy is too heavy? I don't have a hard and fast rule. If sound is a big piece of your style, you'll have a hard time identifying overkill. Ask three or four trustworthy readers who get your intent to help you trim all but the best of your devices.

Metaphor and simile can quickly become overdone. Beware of the tendency to describe every detail through comparisons. Watch out especially for inept comparisons that don't fit the character or situation. Stephanie Thornton posted some hilarious examples of simile gone awry.

A whole-work "controlling metaphor" or motif is often fine, however. If done well, it can unify and strengthen your work. Sarah Dessen's Lock and Key, for example, uses the motif of doors, keys, fences, houses to examine what makes a place home, and people around us family.

Allusion can be an effective way to say a lot in a small space--your reader will pour in all the context without your needing to explain. But if the book, film, song or historical event you reference is too obscure, it hinders rather than helps your reader. A character whose thoughts are filled with allusions to pop culture will come across as shallow and lacking original ideas of his own.

Name dropping brands is another type of allusion that becomes irksome quickly. Call your fleece jacket a "North Face" once, then stick with generic terms like fleece or jacket in subsequent reference.

Dialect
Take extra care when presenting a character whose regional accent isn't mainstream. The best way to handle dialect is through word order, cadence, grammar, and word choice. But go lightly, especially with regionalisms like "youse guys" or "blimey" or "y'all." And as much as possible, stick to standard spellings. If you've done your research and can imitate the cadence and use the right lingo, your readers will "hear" the dialect without the tortured spellings.

Which of these diction areas trips you up? Any other helpful hints to add?

Wednesday, June 8

Oh, happy day! I am pleased to announce the winners of my Triplicity celebration and contest.

I'll begin with the skills portion of the contest. This was a fun one to judge, though I think I may have pulled a muscle busting a gut too many times.

The World's Worst Metaphors and Similes winners are (in alpha order by author):

Kayeleen Hamblin of Kayeleen's Creation Corner

The water fell like the tinkling of a grown man with bladder incontinence.

PK Hrezo of My Fiction Addiction

He persistence was like that of a dog returning time and again with a slobbery rope toy no one wants to play with.

Janet Johnson of Musings of a Children's Writer

His suitcase was as heavy as Grandma's pudding and twice as tasty.


Okay, funny gals, you may choose any one of the following:
~a 10-page detailed critique
~10 pages of copy editing
~an editorial overview of up to 50 pages, outlining areas for growth
~a character naming consultation. I'll help you research and find/create up to three character names, any genre.

Please drop me a line at laurels (dot) leaves (at) gmail (dot) com to arrange your prize of my time/expertise.


And now for the lucky one, the winner of a $30 Amazon gift certificate!

Who do you suppose came up as my random drawing winner?

. . .

Wait for it...


Who will get an Amazon shopping spree?


Who, oh, who?

Seriously, who?

Are you tingling with anticipation yet?


How cruel can I be?


Tell us already!


Okay, okay, don't get violent, friends.

According to RANDOM.ORG,

who so efficiently scrambled my long, long list of entrants,

the winner is...

Jenna Wallace!
of Writing in the Dreamstate

Congrats, Jenna! Drop me a line at laurels (dot) leaves (at) gmail (dot) com with your preferred e-mail address and I'll arrange delivery of your $30 Amazon.com gift certificate. Happy shopping!

Don't forget to come back tomorrow for Thestral Thursday. That's right, it's another issue of our Hogwarts underground newspaper, the Thestral Gazette. The lovely Lisa Galek of Read. Write. Repeat. will bring us a batch of juicy school gossip gathered by her alter ego, Belicia Babble.

Which of the winning similes struck you as funniest? Why?
Wednesday, June 08, 2011 Laurel Garver
Oh, happy day! I am pleased to announce the winners of my Triplicity celebration and contest.

I'll begin with the skills portion of the contest. This was a fun one to judge, though I think I may have pulled a muscle busting a gut too many times.

The World's Worst Metaphors and Similes winners are (in alpha order by author):

Kayeleen Hamblin of Kayeleen's Creation Corner

The water fell like the tinkling of a grown man with bladder incontinence.

PK Hrezo of My Fiction Addiction

He persistence was like that of a dog returning time and again with a slobbery rope toy no one wants to play with.

Janet Johnson of Musings of a Children's Writer

His suitcase was as heavy as Grandma's pudding and twice as tasty.


Okay, funny gals, you may choose any one of the following:
~a 10-page detailed critique
~10 pages of copy editing
~an editorial overview of up to 50 pages, outlining areas for growth
~a character naming consultation. I'll help you research and find/create up to three character names, any genre.

Please drop me a line at laurels (dot) leaves (at) gmail (dot) com to arrange your prize of my time/expertise.


And now for the lucky one, the winner of a $30 Amazon gift certificate!

Who do you suppose came up as my random drawing winner?

. . .

Wait for it...


Who will get an Amazon shopping spree?


Who, oh, who?

Seriously, who?

Are you tingling with anticipation yet?


How cruel can I be?


Tell us already!


Okay, okay, don't get violent, friends.

According to RANDOM.ORG,

who so efficiently scrambled my long, long list of entrants,

the winner is...

Jenna Wallace!
of Writing in the Dreamstate

Congrats, Jenna! Drop me a line at laurels (dot) leaves (at) gmail (dot) com with your preferred e-mail address and I'll arrange delivery of your $30 Amazon.com gift certificate. Happy shopping!

Don't forget to come back tomorrow for Thestral Thursday. That's right, it's another issue of our Hogwarts underground newspaper, the Thestral Gazette. The lovely Lisa Galek of Read. Write. Repeat. will bring us a batch of juicy school gossip gathered by her alter ego, Belicia Babble.

Which of the winning similes struck you as funniest? Why?

Thursday, May 19

I have a quirky love for pattern and symmetry, thus the blogging milestones I chose to celebrate were 111, an "Eleventy one" celebration and 202, my "Too, oh, too Cool" contest.

I'm nearing another such symmetrical milestone--333 followers, so you know what that means. It's time for another celebration with fun and, of course, PRIZES!

My Triplicity celebration and contest is a two-parter--one part skills-based (international), the other, luck-based (US only). You may enter one part of the contest or both, depending on your residency.

Part 1: World's worst metaphors and similes contest
Send up to three entries of original, groan-worthy metaphors or similes (no plagiarism, please) via e-mail as inline text to laurels (dot) leaves (at) gmail (dot) com. For some examples, see my recent blogfest post. This contest is open to international contestants.

The deadline to enter is Tuesday, May 31, 5 p.m. Eastern.

Three top winners will be chosen. Each may chose any one of the following prizes:
~a 10-page detailed critique
~10 pages of copy editing
~an editorial overview of up to 50 pages, outlining areas for growth
~a character naming consultation. I'll help you research and find/create up to three character names, any genre.

Part 2: Prize Drawing
I will be giving away a $30 Amazon gift certificate to one lucky winner (U.S. residents only, please).

To enter, you must leave a comment to this post.

Bonus entries will be given as follows:
+5 Existing follower
+3 New follower as of 5/19
+2 Tweet contest
+2 Link contest on your blog sidebar
+5 Blog about the contest
+10 Pose an "Ask-the-editor" question on grammar, punctuation, critiquing
+1 Calculate your total number of entries

Contest closes Tuesday, May 31, 5 p.m. Eastern.

Come back tomorrow for your weekly dose of Harry Potter hilarity, The Thestral Gazette, featuring celebrity gossip from the wizarding world by guest reporter Melissa Sarno!
Thursday, May 19, 2011 Laurel Garver
I have a quirky love for pattern and symmetry, thus the blogging milestones I chose to celebrate were 111, an "Eleventy one" celebration and 202, my "Too, oh, too Cool" contest.

I'm nearing another such symmetrical milestone--333 followers, so you know what that means. It's time for another celebration with fun and, of course, PRIZES!

My Triplicity celebration and contest is a two-parter--one part skills-based (international), the other, luck-based (US only). You may enter one part of the contest or both, depending on your residency.

Part 1: World's worst metaphors and similes contest
Send up to three entries of original, groan-worthy metaphors or similes (no plagiarism, please) via e-mail as inline text to laurels (dot) leaves (at) gmail (dot) com. For some examples, see my recent blogfest post. This contest is open to international contestants.

The deadline to enter is Tuesday, May 31, 5 p.m. Eastern.

Three top winners will be chosen. Each may chose any one of the following prizes:
~a 10-page detailed critique
~10 pages of copy editing
~an editorial overview of up to 50 pages, outlining areas for growth
~a character naming consultation. I'll help you research and find/create up to three character names, any genre.

Part 2: Prize Drawing
I will be giving away a $30 Amazon gift certificate to one lucky winner (U.S. residents only, please).

To enter, you must leave a comment to this post.

Bonus entries will be given as follows:
+5 Existing follower
+3 New follower as of 5/19
+2 Tweet contest
+2 Link contest on your blog sidebar
+5 Blog about the contest
+10 Pose an "Ask-the-editor" question on grammar, punctuation, critiquing
+1 Calculate your total number of entries

Contest closes Tuesday, May 31, 5 p.m. Eastern.

Come back tomorrow for your weekly dose of Harry Potter hilarity, The Thestral Gazette, featuring celebrity gossip from the wizarding world by guest reporter Melissa Sarno!