Wednesday, January 6
Posted by Laurel Garver on Wednesday, January 06, 2010
12 comments
I had lofty plans to blog about epiphanies for Epiphany, but I am just too brain-dead today. Preparing a piece for Nathan Bransford's YA diary contest entry about killed me. I excerpted from an autobiographical story in progress I started writing kind of on a dare (fie on you, Simon!). Reliving some of the worst bits of growing up with a bipolar parent is not my idea of a good time, but it's what I have to offer the world by way of an authentic teen experience. I'd forgotten how exhausting it is to tame the shame long enough to start exorcising this particular demon. I could use a good primal scream about now, followed by a long winter's nap.
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And here I thought you were going to toss of a page from Dani's fictional diary, but you go and post fictionalized autobiography? Wow.
ReplyDeleteReally, congratulations on digging down with that one. I read it, and it's excellent. Does it help, to get it out and down in pixels? I've found that with my own autobiographical stuff.
Now go take that nap.
Kudos for you for meeting the dare and entering the contest. Can't say I'm up for that, this time.
ReplyDeleteI'd like to join you on that long winter's nap.
I find that anything with an autobiographical tang to it is so much more emotionally difficult than pure fiction, even if it's a positive experience.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Simon. Go take that nap. :)
I always in favor of a long nap. It sounds like you've definitely earned one. I think it's great that you're tackling such an important issue. There are a lot of kids out there who will benefit.
ReplyDeleteLaurel, I read your diary entry and was awed. It really stood out among the many I looked at. Sorry it's taking an emotional toll, but you did cut to the heart.
ReplyDeleteGive your brain a rest Laurel, don't let it clog it all up. I entered it too, among the other 200 something people. I doubt mine will even get noticed but hey, a girl can dream right?
ReplyDeleteLaurel, you should post your paragraph here so I can read it! I am toooo sleepy to go scroll through the entries over at Nathan's blog. :)
ReplyDeleteAnd I feel your pain. My WIP (the one with the Laurel!) is fictionalized fact. It's HARD to write it.
Simon: I'd meant to use something from one of the WIPs, then I started reading other entries and felt this strong tug to do something extremely risky--be authentic in a way some of the others weren't. And no, it didn't really make me feel better to write it. I just feel wrung out trying capture the real emotion in all its complexity: the aching love and desire to fix things all mixed up with shame and helpless rage.
ReplyDeleteNow, that last sentence felt good to write. Whew. Therapy at last. :-)
Elle: I can understand sitting one out. It sounds like you are making good progress with your WIP.
ReplyDeleteKaren: I so agree. I'm remembering once again why I almost never write autobiographically. It's incredibly draining
Shannon: Thanks. I can't tell you how many times I've had someone pull me aside to talk privately about their own family's struggles with a mentally ill family member. I will someday write a whole book on this, once I've developed the skills to do it justice.
ReplyDeleteTricia: Thank you for the kind encouragement. I'm not convinced it's the best I could do, but it's what I seem to be capable of writing now.
GWOE: Last I checked, there were well over 600 entries! Yowza. And thankfully I did get that nap.
ReplyDeleteAmber: I guess I could put it in the sidebar. I still feel incredibly squeamish about this piece.
Ok, it is in the sidebar now for those who are curious.
ReplyDelete